Lying on my bed, in my room alone, and I was thinking to myself, ‘Why am I born this way, why mother…why…?’ as I muffled my face with my hands, trying to wipe off the tears from my eyes and buried my entire face into my soft pillow. Didn’t even bothered to get change into my night gown that was placed at the corner of my bed, nicely folded by Mary Anne… I fell asleep… Dreaming that it will be wonderful and fine the next day to come.

In the morning…

I woke up by the sounds of the birds chirping outside my bedroom window. ‘Oh, what a lovely morning’ I said to myself, gazing outside the window, looking at the garden, full of the lovely flowers, blooming. After a while… ‘That’s all for today morning gazin’ ‘ I chuckled and stretched my body and walking towards the dressing table to get ready for the morning. As I rested my bottoms at the dressing table, I saw thick….thick eye bags / tear bags hanging at the bottom of my eyes and my eyes are red and sore after all that crying last night… I shrieked, as if I came across a terrible nightmare! [You guys know how girls would react when they come across these things~] And, to be honest, I didn’t like the way I looked at the mirror at that time. I looked ridiculous, seriously! I washed my face and tried to put on some face powder under my eyes, just to hide the eye bags. Trust me, I tried really darn hard to cover them, but it just seemed to be impossible to do so. So I just get dressed and head down to the breakfast room with Mary Anne.

Meanwhile, in the breakfast room…

‘Girls, do honestly tell your dear mother what do you think about that PATHETIC and expressionless stepsister of yours. Would you? My darlings.’ She asked the girls in a most unpleasant tone in voice [I don’t think you would like her voice tone either, it rather sounded like some evil witch kind of voice, well, similar to THAT]. The girls were actually having a great time with each other, talking about the dreams that they dreamed yesterday night, princes, rich duke and blah blah blah; yadda yadda yadda… And you can, too, picture that the girls are actually, LITERALLY ignoring stepmother’s question at that time. They blabbers then broke into silence, as stepmother raised her voice, ‘ GIRLS!!’ she shouted. The room then is filled with stepmother’s voice echoing…

The girls were deeply startled when they heard their mother yelled at them. Come on, you wouldn’t have to hear her yell at you when you ACTUALLY listened to her, questioning you earlier, right? But, anyways moving on to my dream…

All of the girls answered their mother’s question with the same answer, saying that – ‘ Mother, I do think that Sarah… Urghh! That pathetic sister of ours is not meant to be in this family either! For SHE, is not lady like enough to be part of this family. And even if she still is a part of our family for the rest of our lives, she might be just a terrible DISGRACE to us all MOTHER!’

Stepmother then nodded to the girls, showing that she was pleased with their answers towards her question and continued fanning herself.

Just then, when I was about to reach the breakfast room with Mary Anne, I could hear very clearly that the girls were stupidly giggling and chuckling in the room. And at that time, I knew they were talking about me and how “disgraceful” I would be in this family. Mary Anne didn’t seemed to be bothered about that though, she was really nice to me [like a second mother or someone special like that], she then opens the door and guided me in, as usual.

As I walked into the room, the girls did the same reaction as they did as always [just like the last chapter of the story], but stepmother didn’t seem to “notice” my presence in the room, I can tell just by looking at how she acts/ behaves the minute I walked through that door every morning, just to get my breakfast.

Just to let you all know, I breakfast period wasn’t that wonderful compared to my life outside of my dream, where my mother greets me in smiles and prepares me warm and tasty food every morning. Well, this is simply different, it is horrible I tell you! Imagine you, living in a big luxurious mansion; dressed appropriately like a lady; served by many servants and subjects in your home serves you wherever you go; but just a cup of tea and two slices of garlic bread for breakfast! Everyday! Can you, tolerate that? Well, of course you can, if you don’t mind starving for the whole afternoons?!

But I don’t really have the strength to care about how horrible my breakfast was, I just finished whatever was placed on my breakfast tray for I was too hungry to hesitate and think, cz’ I didn’t went down for dinner last evening. So after that, I left the breakfast room after breakfast and left for the gardens to spend my morning there. Mary Anne walked with me by my side as always, making sure that I’m safe and out of “trouble” created by those stepsisters of mine.

I’m not sure why, and I don’t really know the reason why I’m so gloomy that day. Mary Anne asked me if I would like to feed breadcrumbs to the birds and fishes near the pond, but I refused to do so. So then, I continued walking around the flower bushes, admiring the beauty of it, I then also picked some daisies and tulips which are planted at the other side of the garden gazebo, was planning to place them in vase that used to be in mother’s room. The vase is in my room now, in a safe place… 

To be continued…….

Smile by Mckimchiited aka Sarah [Stepping into the enchantment]

This dream of mine began with the most enchanting but yet, gloomy and dull. For the colors in this dream that I dreamt is mostly greyish and boring dark, dull colors. Can you actually picture it? I thought to myself, seriously, this could be the most boring dream ever in my life, judging by the colors that I saw, literally pictured everything in dark and greyish scene.

And as I was still looking and wondering how boring this dream would be, I came across a beautiful garden. But the only thing that I don’t really like, it’s the god damn color of it! To be honest, I was literally rubbing my eyes since the starting of this dream. Hmm….very odd, I thought to myself as I walked into this beautiful garden.

There’s a white gazebo with some vines clinging on the sides of it, and it looks a little like a birdcage; as I walked further, I came across a small pond with a bridge that allows you to walk across it to the other side; not to mention, the beautifully cropped bushes and the lovely flowers which are grown in the garden and also the lilies that grew healthily on the surface of the pond. Ain’t it enchanting!! Without pausing there for longer than five whole minutes, I decided to explore the garden some more, just to see if I get to come across anything that is not BORING. So, I continued walking, crossed the bridge and went to the other side of the garden.

I then came across to a huge mansion, the mansion looked a little bit run down to me cz' the colors of the wall outside the mansion is fading or some sort...and the mansion is vines and some leaves growing on the walls, maybe that's because the walls looked so run down, i thought to myself again. I continued walking, but this time, I walked closer to the mansion. I noticed there are rose bushes growing around the mansion, well, NO, it's literally the mansion is surrounded by the rose bushes! This makes me more curious in knowing who's living here, in this huge and beautiful mansion...I mean, who could ever Ever resist such a beautiful place to live? Think about it, big garden, full of lovely flowers; a gazebo which you have tea time there; and not to mention a big house! Where, where you can just do ANYTHING you want to do in it..! ... "Alright, back to earth Sarah. you know you've already have a lovely home back here in the REAL WORLD" I chuckled, thinking that there's no way i could ever live in this kind of place.

*Hearing the birds chirping and flying in the sky, i walked towards a stairs where it leads to a door somewhere into the mansion, and i sat on the steps...admiring the beauty of this such wonderful place.*

Suddenly, 

I heard a voice of a young lady calling my name- "Miss Sarah....Miss Sarah...!- And she happened to walk towards me, she looks like she's in some sort of hurry or so. She came to me, panting and said  - "Miss! Oh, I'm so glad I found you! Madame was looking for you everywhere...! - I was a little startled by her actually, well.. nobody has called me in such a formal way, i paused for awhile and some sort of weird feeling came to me, that I actually knows who she is. I turned to her once again and asked - "What's the matter Mary Anne? Why were you searching for me in such a hurry? I understand that it is quite not the time for dinner yet.So, what is it?" I can see that she's still panting as she adjusted her apron and wiped off the dirt in her hands. She said to me in a clear voice - "No, my lady! It will be portrait day in two days time my lady, and Madame wants me to get you for she has something to say to you."- Without hesitating, I nodded, agreed to follow her back inside the mansion where I called home (only in this particular dream of course), she walked before me and helped me to open the door to let me in. 

*Walking with Mary Anne passing the corridors, I can see many, now when i meant many, it means...MANY. Many portraits hanging against the corridors wall, even beside the candle holders.*
After walking about two minutes or so, we paused in front of a big wooden door. -"Madame is waiting with your sisters inside, you ought to enter now My lady."- she said in a very soft voice to me, helping me with the door as i entered the room, she left after she had shut the door behind me. I have to say that in my dream, I'm a lady? and i live in a huge mansion; i even have my own servant to walk me around!I mean, It is quite awesome cz' you get to be treated like a princess or duchess.... While I was thinking about this, I had a smile on my face....And suddenly, an older woman's voice cracked the wonderful thoughts of mine, in a deep but powerful voice, saying - "Don't you dare smile again Sarah. You bring us nightmares as you cracked that crooked smile of yours." - She looked at me in an angry expression as if I'm a monster.... *I looked up and I saw her sitting by the couch, sipping in a cup of tea; and my stepsisters, they are sitter on the other side of the room as well, reading some books and talking among themselves as they saw me walked in* To be honest with you guys, I didn't like the way they look at me, I really wish I could draw it out so you don't have to imagine how it feels like to be treated like as if  I'm a monster. I keep myself in silence and stood in front of her. She then placed her cup on the tea tray or trolley, whatever.. She continued - " In two days time, it will be portrait day. You know how it is, don't you?"- I can feel the pricks of hatred whenever she talks to me like THAT, but even though I hated her when i first saw her, it is a dream AFTER ALL. So I answered her question in a steady voice, -" Yes, Stepmother. I understand the rules of portrait day and I know, what I have to do."- I was planning to leave the room after saying that to her, but she stopped me from leaving. - "Well, then. There's a new rule since your dearest father passed away from that accident..."- *tears starting to gather around my eyes, trying not to cry, I stood there, silently* -" I thought that I should let you know the rules since I'm in charge of the house now. The rule is simple: You are to smile properly when portrait day comes or else you are not to be part of this family anymore. You disgrace me and my dear daughters whenever you show that crooked smile of yours. Honestly, I didn't like you and I never had accepted you as my step daughter. Your appearance just look exactly like your DEAD mother, I didn't liked her either. But you, child, is a exceptional because of your smile....*she paused a bit to see, whether I've cried and continued* - "You may go now."- *I sobbed and walked towards the door* -"Oh, and once more thing, DO practice your smile and prepare for portrait day~You don't want to disgrace your family now, don't you, child?"- -"Yes, stepmother......"- I closed the door once I'm outside the room.

After I've shut the door, I can hear the voices of chuckles and laughter of my stepsisters behind the door. Leaving the room feeling like a useless monster, miserable and sad.... I stormed into my room which is located at the left side, up the stairs....Slammed the door and I lay down at my bed, started crying my heart out....I was so depressed that I didn't even bother to have dinner and supper...I cried through the night, till my tears are totally dried off........


To be continued........

Smile by Mckimchiited aka Sarah [Preface]

Hello there, fellow bloggers. It’s been a long time since I last posted on my blog. I used to post articles about talented and funny YouTubers that I’ve seen on the YouTube. But this time, I’m going to post something different, even I did not expect this to come across my mind during my sleep that night. To be honest to you fellow bloggers and readers of my blog, I hesitated, whether should I post about this dream that I dreamt the other day? Or should I not post it? Come to think of it, I think I should…And so I decided to share my story that I experience in my dream that I, dreamt the other day. The dream…. That I can’t possibly forget…

It was 15^th of April 2014 Tuesday,

I usually go to bed quite late at night, cz’ I have problems in getting into bed early and start sleeping like the other young adults, well my case sounded like I have insomnia. To be honest, I don’t. I just can’t sleep, and yes, there’s no reason why I can’t. And I don’t know why either. So I  usually spent my before bed-times like listening to calming music, watching YouTube videos on my mobile phone, and sometimes accompany friends who are not sleepy yet. I always thought to myself, why can’t I sleep anyways? Or maybe I think too much during the day, or I’m just worried about everything that is in my life? I know, that’s stupid thoughts. After I’ve done all that silly things that I thought would help me to sleep, it was 3.30 am

I checked my phone top menu again just to make sure if there’s any battery left in the battery bar, it’s going to be empty soon, I thought to myself… So I decided to call it a day and have a shut eye…

And so….immediately I fell into this deam…..

To be continued……